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Saturday, August 16, 2014

In Which Mascots Rivalries Bring Out The Best In Baseball

Okay, so a number of baseball clubs have mascots who race each other in the middle of the fifth inning in an attempt to lure fans back to their seats after losing them to boredom and the sweet siren's song of french fried EVERYTHING around the fourth inning.

The Milwaukee Brewers have sausages,



The Oakland A's have past players



The Washington Nationals have oversized Presidents




and the Pirates have Pierogies, in deference to our large Eastern European population. And their delicious booty-expanding fillings. Mmmmm….



Anywho, the last couple of years the competition has been getting fierce between the Presidents and the hometown dumplings. There is no love lost betwix these rival mascots. They travel to each other's cities several times during the season to throw down in a hugely amusing manner.

It started with this pile up and beat down:




Then our stuffed dough balls drew first blood by plotting a prank to T-Bone Teddy on the homestretch by launching himself off of a table. You can watch the video here. (Oh, and hey I actually figured out how to post it below. Score one for the antiquity. Woot!)




Tonight Teddy had revenge on his mind, and turned the table, so to speak, using the same diabolical technique to table dive on an unsuspecting Potato Pete.



OMG, I LOVE THIS SO MUCH!!

Geo and I were CRYING watching the GIF over and over and over and over… infinity.

If I wasn't such a fucking dinosaur and had any kind of computer skills, I could post the hilarious GIF directly onto this blog. But, alas, my T-Rex arms are too short and my brain too pea-like to make that happen. Instead, a link to the GIF is here.

Teddy totally made Potato Pete his bitch, YO! Then just to be a total douche, he crushes him AGAIN after taking the tape. Ha Ha!

There are TONS of other mascot mayhem videos on the YouTube to entertain your ass for hours. I just wasted about 30 minutes of my life laughing my butt off.

Oh, baseball. You're antics are good for the soul.