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Wednesday, August 25, 2010


What I Did On My Summer Vacation - Part Deux
or road trip to rural New York with my own Betty White

Okay, so my Mum, Big Mar, hasn't been to see my brother for a proper vacation in about five years. She's almost 89 and doesn't feel comfortable being on a plane by herself. Since I had a week of no plans in the middle of my two weeks off...

Did I tell you I had two weeks off in a row? OMG! Best. Thing. EVA! If you've never taken two weeks off, DO IT! It's the absolute best way to decompress and forget your workplace.

But I digress...

Since I had no plans for the week, Big Mar and I decided to drive up to the Hudson Valley to impose upon...er, visit my brother and sister-in-law. They live in the charming town of New Paltz...a mere stone's throw from my fantasy hubby's domicile.

*Sigh*
"Wait... What?!? You were in my town? Why didn't you tell me?"

Aaaaa... Look. He's bummed he missed me. What a sweetheart! Sorry, Hon. This visit was all about family time. Next time we'll hook up for sure. Take you out on the river. Promise.

Anywho, we buzzed up north in Rita, our radiant, red, riding machine. We made it in record time--6 1/2 hours, thanks in large part to the NASCAR nature of I-287. Man oh man! That was big FUN! Just keeping up with traffic, I was sailing along at an almost steady clip of 89.

So anyway, this was the first time I ever spent concentrated, one-on-one time with my SIL, Leslie. Weird, but true. She's been a member of our family since 1987, but we've never had the opportunity to hang out at length.

She's an artist in the truest sense of the word. She's a fiber artist and ceramicist by trade, but everything about her--her dress, her home, her meals is a work of art.
the guest bedroom inspired by pods she found on the road
mushrooms in the corner of the dining room
that's random cutlery affixed and framed on the right
she even makes crappy lampshades festive and bright
Hydra-inspired trees made of plastic bottles and discarded pipes
I think they look like palms

She's an organic artist using recycled materials (clothes, buttons, bottles) to replicate her visions of nature. Her interest in fiber started after her children grew up and out of their baby clothes. She couldn't bare to part with them, so wove them into tapestries and pillows so they would be with her always. Sweet, isn't it. From there she's gone on to purses, vessels and totems.

Their house unintentionally doubles as an installation of her work. It's everywhere and she's always changing it. There's something interesting to found everywhere, even places you wouldn't expect like those little, boingy doorstops. She can't help it. It's who she is. And it is absolutely delightful!! Her youthful enthusiasm is infectious...in a very good way. She's just plain cool.

You: But wait, what did you guys do while you were there?
Me: Alright I'm getting there. How long have you known me? You haven't noticed I'm verbose and ramble on and on and on, ad nauseum? What are you, new?

So, anywho...She and I are early risers, so we went to a supposed off limits watering hole that has beautiful waterfalls. I say "supposed" because apparently lots of folks trek through the fencing to swim in the stream. It's gorgeous there. Tranquil. Quiet, except for the rush of water. Just us and their puppy, Otto.
We so naughty

Surprisingly I didn't fall and crack my ass on the uber slippery rocks. Thank God it was just the two of us, because the sight of me crawling ashore, desperately clawing for purchase is no sight for man nor beast nor...Sasquatch, for that matter. For the record, Grace is not my middle name.

By the time we stopped for breakfast and wandered around the grooviness that is New Paltz, Big Mar was up so we hit the road for Woodstock to meet up with Leslie's Mom. After lunch the old gals hung at the restaurant shooting the shite while Les and I roamed the streets in search of ... whatever. There were so many unique clothes! I could have spent a fortune to look oh-so-groovy chic. Instead, I bought these hilarious BlackBars instant anonymity glasses.

OMG!!! I LOVE these things!! They make the most innocent of photos seem sordid. We are totally taking our next formal family picture with these things on.
Big Mar and her cohort, Brownie plotting their next heist over a nice cuppa tea

What the hell are these old gals up to anyway? What's she packing in that cane?

The next morning we dragged Big Mar along with us to a small river. We set her up on shore and dove in to race Otto to the thrown sticks.
another peaceful morning in the beautiful Hudson Valley
Big Mar chilling on the shore
Les and Otto
We tuckered him out

On the way home we stopped in the mountains for a scenic look, then home to meet my bro, Buddy. Next stop--a spin on the Hudson in his little boat.
rock climbing cliff behind us-also filming of Last of the Mohicans took place around here
mmmm...Daniel Day Lewis!!!

My poor Mum. She was terrified to walk the plank to the boat, but we got her in with little difficulty and off we went. (now the deboarding was a little more...challenging. let's just say we didn't drop her in the drink and leave it at that, shall we. We shall.)

It was a gorgeous day. Barely a cloud in the sky. We buzzed past the Astor property where the tents from Chelsea Clinton's wedding were still standing. Then Bud opened her up to head downstream.
lighthouse near mouth of marina
I love boats.

My brother-in-law, David used to have a sail boat we took out on Long Island Sound. Many a day we spent hanging over the edge to counterbalance as the wind zipped us along the open waters. Exhilarating.
Buddy. Happy.
Bud loves boats, too. Look how happy he looks. He works so hard. He really deserves this kind of fun.

Boating and Beer. A nautical tradition passed down for generations.

Once we parked, Les and I jumped in the surprisingly clean Hudson giving Big Mar and Bud a chance to spend some quality alone time together.
Because we can't go anywhere without jumping

I swear to God I was submerged in water more these two days than the entire summer. HaHa!

Look at Big Mar gazing adoringly at her baby Boi-ee. We always jag her that he's her favorite. But, come on! He totally is. Of course it has nothing to do with the fact that he's charming, funny, successful, generous and handsome.

Wait.. Ewwwww. That sounds like I have a crush on my brother. Ewww. No! He used to torture me when I was a kid, but fortunately now he's just a really good guy. Plus I'm not afraid to give it right back to him. So there's that.

We left the next day, but not before eating exotic poached eggs at the primo Bistro Cafe in town. Oh and stocking up on the most beautifully crafted tie-dye shirts. Apparently I'm a sucker for tie dye as well as joke prop glasses.

Big Mar and I had a great time. It was so wonderful to visit with Bud and Les in their own habit trail for a change. We're going to try to make this an annual event.

Oh Oh... a funny thing from the drive home. I pulled into a gas station in Carlisle so we could stretch our legs. While we were stopped a HUGE semi pulled behind us on his way out to the highway. Big Mar looks at me and says, "Holy Hell. Watch out for that big-ass truck behind you"

Ha Ha!! My 88 year old mother used the term "big-ass"! How awesome is that? It's like traveling with Betty White.
What I Did On My Summer Vacation - Part 1 
because there was just way too much awesome for one posting

Okay, so I have been woefully inadequate at keeping up with all the happenings this latter part of summer. I've been having such a terrific season. I don't want it to end. Ever. It's been oppressively hot and humid, but I've actually come to enjoy the ever-present moist conditions. Quite the accomplishment managing one's own personal summer along with the discomfort of the season itself. Plus, my usually lifeless, dull wavy-ish hair has decided to curl into lovely ringlets. Sweet!


The shorter days, longer shadows and cooler winds we're having this week are making me feel melancholic. I'm not ready for the Fall yet. I DON'T want to watch football! And I am NOT wearing socks, dammit!! It's only August, for Hell's sake!?! 


I propose Fall take an extended vacation for another two months, you know, until October when hockey starts. Then it can come over for dinner, we'll drink some wine, watch movies, kibitz... It'll be fun. In October.


But I digress...


My Awesome Sauce Summer Vacay started with our annual Card Club weekend trip to Mentor, Ohio on Lake Erie. Every year we pile into a couple vehicles-squeezing in amongst all the junk food and liquor boxes-and make the 2+ hour jaunt northwest to bask and bond in the bountiful sunshine. 


Even though we never play games at our monthly "meetings", we tend break out the games for vacation. This year we played Fact or Crap which we turned into a drinking game. Natch. 
Salsa and Hummus and Cheesy dip, oh my!
Um...I'll say CRAP. Definitely.

As you can see the table was covered with more snacks and spiked beverages than game pieces. 


We did the usual... drank, strapped on the feed bag, exchanged the most hideously horrifying thing found in your house disguised in a beautifully wrapped package...
Yeah. Those slippers are made from Maxi Pads. Hmmmm...pretty..icky, that is.

drove all the men mad at the beach & pool with our babe-iliciousness.. What? Shut up! It's my blog. I'll spin it however I want.
Too much brilliant Babeness for one swimming hole
Even the sun couldn't compete with our gorgeousness and decided to hide
Nice roots, Chippie.


Through a hotel SNAFU, my sister and I actually had a bedroom and real bed to sleep in this year. A ginormously comfortable first!! We always end up in the living room on the sleep sofa. We celebrated by jumping on the bed...
Not bad air for an old gal
The blood stain I left on the ceiling wasn't too noticeable. I kid. It took us a while to scrape it off. Shit! That ceiling was rough.


We tortured Di on her birthday. Every year we're away during the anniversary of her birthing. This year was the big Hawaii 5-0. We snuck a severed head in her bed, ala The Godfather. Like any true girl, the chocolate cake made up for it...along with the jello shots.

Poor Di. She's the only true lady in our group. She's elegant and graceful... and each year we hit new heights of retardedness.
Madonna stopped by to impart her well wishes

We hide severed heads, make her wear stupid things, and yet she laughs her way through it. It must be the whiskey.
Somehow this severed head has become our mascot
at least they ain't made of maxi pads
Di actually wore these stupid things without any cajoling from us. Can you believe it? I think the liquor's successfully killed the brain cells that make her give a damn. HaHa!


The rest of the time we spent hammering out our travel plans for next year's 20th anniversary vacation. Believe it or not, we've been together for 20 years... where does the time go. It's true what "they" say. Years zoom by when you're having a blast with a gaggle of crazy-assed girlfriends.


Next year we set our sites on Myrtle Beach in May. South Carolina. You've been warned.